18 Weeks Pregnant with Baby R

How far along? 18 weeks

How big is baby? The size of an Sweet Potato. (yum...sweet potato fries :-) ) 

Sleep? This is going to sound odd but I start getting numb on my hips if I lay on either side too long so I switch sides throughout the night which wakes me up, other than that sleep has been pretty good. (which I am thankful for since this girl loves her sleep)

Best moment this week?  We went to Cleveland to visit my in laws, it was so fun, I love spending time there and wish we were closer. 

Movement? Yes and I can't wait for Barrett to get to feel it too.

Food cravings? Twix candy bars (=fatty fatty fat pants)  I am dreading all the Halloween candy because I know I will lack self control...which means I am not allowed to go to Target for a couple months lol.

Gender? Still thinking boy.  So many people have told me I look like I'm carrying a boy, not one person has said girl.  We will find out for sure September 12th!

What I miss? Wine, flat stomach and not having to wear granny panties.

What I am looking forward to? Seeing our little bean on Sept 12th and celebrating our 2 year wedding anniversary the same day!

Weekly wisdom? STOP STRESSING!!!  (I need to follow this advice)

Milestones? Baby is yawning, hiccuping and swallowing. 

Geeze I look tired!

Fears

I don't know if my feelings are normal or if I'm just a crazy person.  I feel like I can't get as excited as I want to be about this baby because I have this irrational fear of thinking it's too good to be true and could all end at any moment.  I guess every mom or mom-to-be has a certain level of fear and anxiety.  Every milestone I think "OK once I reach this stage I will let myself get excited or I can relax" but it doesn't come.  I thought it would get easier once we heard a heartbeat or once I made it to the second trimester but now, with about two weeks until the anatomy scan I find myself saying it again.  Every single time I go to the doctors I expect them to say "oh I'm so sorry Mrs. Robinson but you lost the baby or the baby has this issue ______."  I have a feeling that even if we get a clean bill of health for our littlest one that I will STILL think the rug will be pulled from underneath at any moment.

I don't know what is wrong with me or why I think this way,  maybe I am a pessimist or maybe it is a defense mechanism, I really don't know.  I was so nervous to tell people we were pregnant, I actually wanted to wait until 20 weeks and the anatomy scan.  Even with my growing belly and little kicks I feel from the inside I can't believe this is actually true, that I am actually pregnant.   It's really hard to explain because it isn't really a depressed feeling or even an anxious feeling, more of denial, if that makes sense.  I think it has to do with the fact that nothing is in my control, yes I am eating well, taking care of myself and this little one, taking my prenatal vitamins/fish oil/folic acid, etc but in reality everything is already in motion, I cannot do any more than I already am and that in itself is insanely terrifying.   I'm hoping after our 20 week ultrasound on Sept 12th (which happens to be our 2 year wedding anniversary) I will be able to embrace this pregnancy and set my fears aside.  We shall see...

17 Weeks Pregnant with Baby R

How far along? 17 weeks

How big is baby? The size of an Onion. 

Sleep?   I'm sleeping ok, I get uncomfortable easily and roll around a lot but nothing horrible.

Best moment this week?  We are going to Cleveland this weekend to see the Barrett's family, I am SO excited!  I also went to the Doctor on Wednesday, everything looks good and the baby's heartbeat sounds great.  I scheduled my anatomony scan for September 12th, which happens to be our 2 year wedding anniversary.  I can't wait to see our little bambino and make sure he/she is healthy and growing just as he should.  We also get to find out the sex, although I feel like I already know it's a boy, even though I have nothing but instinct to base this on lol.  Oh we also got our house, we close on September 25th, which also happens to be our 4 year anniversary of our first date! 

Worst moment this week? Heartburn!  How one gets heartburn from an apple or water, I will never know. 

Movement? Yes, not a ton, but I can't wait to feel him/her from the outside.

Food cravings? Nothing really.

Gender? Still thinking boy. 

What I miss? Wine, although I did have a teeny tiny glass of champagne and woosh did it hit me!

What I am looking forward to? Seeing our little guy again and making sure he is healthy in there.

Weekly wisdom? Keep Tums everywhere, in the car, at my desk, in my purse, in the nightstand...you never know when that little dragon in your belly will start breathing fire.

Milestones? Baby's rubbery cartilage is turning to bone, so exciting!

Belly is growing!  I haven't gained much weight but you wouldn't know it from the picture.

NYC Flashback-Britney Spears Concert

I figured since I didn't start this blog until after I moved away from NYC I should do a little flashback post to record my memories.

I have always loved me some Britney.  Girlfriend sure rode the crazy train for awhile but who hasn't gone off the deep end a little, right?   I happened to get some last minute front row tickets to Britney Spears the night of the concert and was thrilled.  I of course brought one of my besties Britt, who is not such a big fan but knew she would have fun.  We happened to run into a couple other friends who were going to the concert so we all met up for drinks beforehand.  This is one of the reasons I love NYC, there is ALWAYS something going on and last minute tickets to something fabulous is a common occurrence.  Brit Brit did not disappoint, it was a great show and she looked amazing. 

Jordin Sparks did the pre-show

16 Weeks Pregnant with Baby R

How far along? 16 weeks

How big is baby? The size of an Avocado. 

Sleep? I've been sleeping great this week.  I've had the craziest dreams that were so vivid and real.  Barrett was out of town on a boys trip this week/weekend and I woke up one night from the most terrifying dream of my life.  I had a dream that the baby had some crazy disease that made him like a rabid wild animal and they were going to take him away from me when he was born and lock him up because he was too dangerous.  I woke up drenched in sweat and shaking, it was awful!!  It was so real that I could see the baby on the ultrasound and when I woke up I even googled it to make sure it wasn't something real that could actually happen. 

Best moment this week?  My bestie Britt is coming Friday and I can't wait to see her. 

Worst moment this week? We did the inspection on the house we like and it came back with some issues, while not the end of the world it will need to be discounted by the seller for us to move forward.  I have also had awful heartburn, I hate it!

Movement? Yes but I can't wait to feel him/her from the outside.

Food cravings? Orange juice and granola.

Gender? Still thinking boy. 

What I miss? Not getting winded when I walk up the stairs, it is the oddest thing!

What I am looking forward to? Finding out the sex and finding out if we got the house.

Weekly wisdom? Enjoy this time, it goes by so quickly.

Milestones? The baby can hear our voices.  I better stop yelling at the cats!

Looking more pregnant

Woah, big belly!

15 Weeks Pregnant with Baby R

How far along? 15 weeks

How big is baby? The size of an Orange. 

Sleep? I've had a hard time this week with sleep.  I think it is more anxiety than anything else.  We put an offer in on a house and am waiting to hear back.

Best moment this week?  Finding a house we really like, it needs work but it is in a great location and  has great bones.

Worst moment this week?  I got super dizzy one night, it felt like I had way too much to drink and had the spins, I had to hold on to the wall to go upstairs to bed.  It was awful and scary but I will bring it up with my doctor next week.  From what I've read, it's normal.

Movement? Yes and I love it.

Food cravings? Orange juice and rolls with butter.

Gender? Still thinking boy.  Hopefully we will know next week.

What I miss? Wine, sandwiches, sushi and a flat stomach. (and not being constipated if I'm being honest)

What I am looking forward to? Finding out the sex and finding out if we got the house.

Weekly wisdom? I don't really have any this week but I guess if I could give myself some advice it would be, stop thinking you look fat, it is normal to have a growing belly, you are growing a human for g*d's sake!  I am still in that little belly phase that just looks like I ate too much and am gaining weight, well to me anyways. 

Milestones? Baby's joints and limbs can all move now.